Sommerleigh Pollonais, Senior Writer
It’s that magical time of year once again and no, I’m not talking about winter wonderlands, giant Christmas trees or Mariah Carey trying to officially have herself labelled the Queen of Christmas (that last one is actually true, Google it!). No, I’m talking about Christmas crossover movies, the kind genre fans live for as we tend to think of standard Christmas movies as a form of torture.
These are the movies that are made by people who love making fun of this holiday as much as we do, and every year we usually get at least a couple of these fun mashups to help pass the holidays. Now I wanted to keep the list at new releases only, but we only got three new ones to add to the crossover list. But the good news is two out of the three were a lot of fun and the last few years had some entertaining additions as well. So, with that in mind I’m going to throw in a couple from earlier years that are worth watching again.
With a Ho Ho here we go, here are my Top 5 Fun Christmas Crossover Movies:
#5 Demonic Christmas Tree (The Not So Great One)
Also known as The Killing Tree, I had high hopes for this one as there’s nothing better than a bad movie that knows it’s bad and embraces it.
A widow cast a spell to bring back her serial killer husband only to screw up the spell and have his spirit inhabit a Christmas tree. Yeah, it’s as bonkers as it sounds but unfortunately most of the film is a wasted opportunity to create a fun dumb movie. There are a few fun moments here and there as watching a Christmas tree chase down its victims only to kill them using its lights and branches was good for a chuckle here and there. But most of the kills are underwhelming and the actors are way too restrained in their roles considering the zany plot.
Still, this one might be fun with a group of friends and a lot of eggnog. The noggy-ier the better if you get my drift. And now on to the great entries on this list.
#4 Silent Night
For some people Christmas time can be a downer so this may not be the kind of movie you want to add to your watchlist if you’re not in the mood to add to your existential dread. But if you’re looking for a story that combines this family holiday with an apocalyptic event then Silent Night is the gift that keeps on giving.
With Matthew Goode and Kiera Knightley in the lead roles, it’s a slow burn that’s funny, heartfelt and ends with the kind of twist that makes you wonder what comes next. Plus, Silent Night the song is probably stuck in your head and for some, that’s a horror movie right there. You’re welcome.
This one made my list of Top 5 Scariest Santas already, but I just had to bring it back. Mel Gibson plays the illustrious Fatman better known as Santa Claus and has to deal with a miniature psycho in the form of a young kid who sends an assassin played by the always fun Walter Goggins (Justified, Predators) to take out Saint Nick and his missus.
Yes, it’s as awesome as it sounds, and Gibson is a blast in the role of a Santa who can dish out an ass whooping just as efficiently as he dishes out presents. If you missed out now is the perfect time of year to add this to your watchlist.
#2 Christmas Bloody Christmas
Is there anything better than getting a gift that wasn’t just a surprise but turns out to be a fun surprise!
Christmas Bloody Christmas is straightforward tale of a couple of friends who own a music store and decide to spend the holidays getting drunk and partying, only to run afoul of a store Santa. Not JUST a store Santa mind you, but a robotic store Santa that was originally built to be a military weapon.
It’s 80’s inspiration at its best as the story feels like a blend of Silent Night Deadly Night meets Chopping Mall. Hell, I’ll even throw The Terminator in there. And with enough time devoted to developing the lead characters of Tori, played to perfection by Riley Dandy and her friend Robbie (Sam Delich) you’ll actually find yourself invested in their survival.
The kills are gloriously gory, the premise gets straight to the point and Christmas Bloody Christmas is just what the doctor ordered for fans who prefer their Christmas movie treats with a heavy dash of horror.
#1 Violent Night
What would you get if you took Home Alone, It’s a Wonderful Night and Fatman and throw in a R rating? You’ll probably get a movie that looks a lot like this one. Starring Stranger Things alum David Harbour in the role of a Santa Claus who’s tired of kids only caring about what the get from the holidays and not what they can give instead. This not-so-jolly St. Nick finds himself stuck in the middle of a major heist when a group of highly trained thieves take an affluent family hostage with the hope of beaking into their safe and robbing them of millions of dollars. Did I say Home Alone? Maybe I should’ve thrown Die Hard in there instead.
Yes, the story isn’t all that original but what makes Violent Night fun is David Harbour’s genuine investment in the role. Not only does he have the look, but he also delivers on all the emotional bits and his relationship with possibly the only kind and decent person in the family, young Trudy (Leah Brady), gives the story a level of heart and depth I wouldn’t have expected from a movie such as this.
But you’re not here for the mushy stuff, you want to know about the action and I’m happy to report Violent Night more than lives up to its name. This Santa bashes skulls as much as he drops F-bombs with each and every kill making you go “OH DAMN!”. John Leguizamo plays the main baddie and I can honestly say I didn’t know he had it in him as “Luigi” will have you hating him from beginning to delicious end. Seriously Santa could be a character in Mortal Kombat after that ending!
So if you rather put out your eyes with hot coals than watch another Hallmark Christmas movie, these Christmas crossovers are just what the doctor ordered. Or in this case, some not so jolly Santas delivering guns, knives and a sledgehammer to those unfortunate enough to make their Naughty list.
Happy Holidays Horror Fans!
And you can check out more holiday-themed lists below:
Sommerleigh of the House Pollonais. First of Her Name. Sushi Lover, Queen of Horror Movies, Comic Books and Binge Watching Netflix. Mother of two beautiful black cats named Vader and Kylo. I think eating Popcorn at the movies should be mandatory, PS4 makes the best games ever, and I’ll be talking about movies until the zombie apocalypse comes.
Double Tap Baby!